Friday, July 30, 2010

Melancholy


Today is a strange day.
To begin with it is Friday, oh happy day.
My husband comes home tonight from his week away for work, awesome day.
A friend of mine is in labour as I type, wonderful, amazing day.
Today there was a funeral, what a very sad day.

Funerals always make me think about the life I feel I'm missing. I live with anxiety, and it stops me from doing so much. The only thing that helps me get through the day, is thinking it will be a good day today. I now try to use mindfulness to help me through anxiety. I strive to look at what I have achieved throughout each day. Instead of what I haven't done, but what I have done. And look at that like a  triumph, no matter how small.

Remember today, to tell the one's you love how much they mean to you. Even if you don't, or can't say I love you, show them in kindness. Make them a cup of tea, without asking. Bake them a cake or cookies not just for a birthday. Whatever makes them smile, not you.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Chocolate and Coconut Slice


I found this recipe on taste.com.au. The picture looked so good I just had to try them. I adjusted the recipe slightly, firstly the sugar, I don't like anything to sickly sweet, so I used less sugar in the base. I also added a little rosewater to the coconut for a bit of a twist. I also used a flavoured chocolate for the topping. They are a lot softer than what I expected, the base was almost cake like! I loved that. I made these for my husband who is coming home tomorrow! They are just bite sized, but I should of cut them much larger, they are far too easy to eat in the mini version. I hope there are some left for hubby....

Base
80 grams dark chocolate melted
80 grams butter, softened
1/4 cup caster sugar
1 egg, whisked lightly
1 cup plain flour
3 tablespoons cocoa powder

Filling
1 cup shredded coconut
395 gram tin of sweetened condensed milk
2 eggs
2 teaspoons rosewater

Topping
60 grams butter
100 grams chocolate, I used the nestle dark chocolate with cherry and cashews.

Preheat the oven to 180C.
Base.
Beat the sugar with the butter, then add the egg and beat until mixed through. Then stir in the melted chocolate.
Next sift in the cocoa powder and flour into the chocolate mixture, and mix. Then spread the mixture into a brownie tin. Bake this for 15 minutes.
Filling.
Mix all the ingredients in a bowl, then pour on top of the chocolate base. Bake this for 25 minutes. Cool completely. Then place into the fridge for 20 minutes.
Topping.
Melt the butter and chocolate together. Pour over the slab and spread. Place in back in the fridge for the chocolate to harden slightly. Then cut!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Babies

I read a beautiful post on Fat Mum Slim's blog. It was about the time when Chantelle was pregnant, and how she couldn't get enough of the birthing stories, and the wanting of the magical moment when you finally meet your bub. You can read Fat Mum Slim's blog here.

I had a miscarriage last year that has affected me in so many ways. I cry at almost anything now! I now also suffer from anxiety and some panic attacks. I never used to be like this, but now I cry all the time. Even commercials get to me, I just have to see the pedigree adoption drive, oh the gorgeous little scruffy puppy! Or the world vision ads, they all make my bottom lip quiver. I am such a wimp now!

I see babies and think about how beautiful they are, even when they are screaming, snotty and horrible. I read about the sleep depriving nights and days, and how intensely I want them too....

I know one day I will be a mummy. I know that even if I didn't give birth to that child, that I will still feel that intense love. The moment you meet your child and the agonising love you feel.

I have waited for such a long time now that it is so hard to always be positive. And I think I will positively scream the next time I hear a anyone tell me, NOT to think about it and it will happen!

Now, I obsessively fill my days with food, what to buy? what to cook? what to eat? But it is always in the back of my mind. I can't help it.....

Monday, July 26, 2010

Chocolate and Peanut Butter Brownie

I made these for hubby, he loves brownies. He is going to be away for the rest of the week for work. I wanted him to have something from home to snack on. I can't stand being on my own all the time lately it gets quite lonely....
I got this recipe off the back of the nestle baking cocoa. I love the fact that you use cocoa, and not a block of chocolate. Although I did add chocolate chunks into the mix! Keep the chocolate chunks quite big, so they don't melt away in the batter when baked. I did change a few things though. They came out a little dry, but I have added more butter since and not baked them for as long, and they were perfect! This is an easy, mix-it-all-in-one-bowl recipe, which I love.

190 grams butter
1 cup nestle baking cocoa
4 eggs, whisked
3/4 cup sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla
3/4 self raising flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/3 cup nuts, whatever ones you like, roughly chopped
100 grams dark chocolate chopped into chunks
1/3 cup chunky peanut butter

  • Preheat the oven to 160c. Line a pan 27cm x 18cm x 3 cm with baking paper.
  • Melt the butter. Sift the cocoa into a bowl then add the butter, stir and allow to cool.
  • Add the eggs, mix until incorporated. Stir in sugar and vanilla.
  • Sift in the flour and baking powder, stir that through. Then add the nuts and chocolate chunks. Spread it into the prepared tin.
  • Warm the peanut butter slightly and then dot on the top of the brownie mixture, swirl as much as you want.
  • Bake for about 35-45 minutes, depending how you like your brownies, gooey or firm. Leave to cool slightly in the pan, about 15 minutes, then turn onto a wire rack. Cut when cold.



I do have this little man, Chucky, to keep me company, so I'm not completely lonely. Chucky is also a big fan of peanut butter! 



Happy baking! xo

Brasserie Bread 2

Went back to Brasserie Bread with hubby and mum. Today wasn't as impressive as it was yesterday. Mum and I had the pancakes with berries, while husband had the brioche with chocolate spread. I know that berries aren't that great at the moment, but I hate frozen! Some of them were still really cold, while other's were too mushy, bit disappointing cause I was really looking forward to this dish. This is meant to be one of their signature dishes.
The guy that made our coffee yesterday wasn't at the machine, disappointing cause it wasn't as good...
I'd rate today a 6/10. Definitely had better.


This looks like normal bread, but it was a delicious toasted brioche, with a wicked chocolate spread!

Brasserie Bread

Hubby took me out for lunch yesterday to Brasserie Bread. It was the same place that was on Masterchef. Strangely enough we live quite close to this place and I have never seen it before yesterday. I don't usually go to a place that I see on the telly, we only decided to go there yesterday after driving past it, and realised when inside, that this was the same place.

Well I have to say this was a wonderful find. It was so tasty, not to loud or cramped and the food was divine.

I had a smoked trout with feta and poached eggs. Hubby had a sandwich with haloumi, pickles, yoghurt, tomatoes and spinach, delicious. I also saw these wonderful looking pancakes coming out, I will definitely try those next time! Even the coffee was great, usually we are disappointed by the coffee, but this was great, not burnt or too hot, just perfect with the food offerings. I have to give it at least an 8/10. We will be going again regularly.



Check out the website, there are classes, you can also order bread online. http://www.brasseriebread.com.au/

A place to unwind

Last week I went to Fingal Bay with my hubby. What a serene and beautiful place to be with someone you love. I have been here before a few years ago, but this was in the height of summer, and didn't think it would hold the same appeal that it did in winter. Oh how wrong I was!

Even the whales came out to say hello! But I didn't have my camera when I saw them though...






There were beautiful walking/riding tracks dotted around the bay, this one was parallel to the beach.

A kookaburra along the walking path!!